So, if you are being bullied, TELL, TELL, TELL

• Keep a note or diary of what is happening
• Practise what you want to say
• Talk over what to do with a friend, a teacher, your mum or dad or an adult you trust
• Don't give up
• Ask your parents or carers to visit the school
• In the meantime, have a look at some of the other websites mentioned on the page called 'Helpful websites'. Apart from some tips like being careful about being on your own, they will show you that lots of people get bullied and it is not your fault
• If you're being bullied by text messages or phone calls, look at the separate page about it called 'New methods of bullying'

Remember that teachers have to listen carefully when a child tells them about being bullied.

Remember - it's right to tell an adult that you are being bullied and to ask for their help. You don't have to let them take over. You can talk with them about what you would like to happen.

Advice from other kids

From Claire:

Whatever you do - TELL SOMEONE! Make people listen to you and don't take no for an answer. Make a logbook of bullying incidents to use as evidence if need be. You have the right to live without fear. Don't think that you're being a "grass" - why should you do a bully a favour by keeping quiet? Bullying thrives on silence and secrecy.
It's difficult but do try to make yourself look brave if something happens, even though you're quaking in your boots. Another thing to bear in mind is that bullying is surprisingly impersonal! A lot of bullies have traumatic personal lives and pick on victims because they want to make themselves feel "big" and often randomly select someone often for the most trivial of reasons. Lastly, it isn't your fault. Stay safe and good luck

From Anon:

It is never, ever your fault. Step back and assess the whole situation and try to find out why it is going on. Fine someone you can really trust and tell them everything. Don't hold any details back. Remember this is your life and you don't have to suffer for anyone.
Take no crap! Life is too short. If you don't stand up for yourself you will regret it later in life and it will affect you. It will stop. Have faith and courage in yourself and it will get you through.

From Stewart:

Try to find out who else is being bullied, strength in numbers does work. If you can't tell your parents, tell your grandparents as it is usually much easier; At school breaks try to be somewhere safe such as in detention or the library; If bullies pick up on something like the way you walk, try to laugh at yourself and carry on acting as you were before .... . If you agree with them, they lose their point.

From Sam:

Don't let anyone tell you that once you have been a victim to bullies you will always be. You won't.

From Alice:

If you are being bullied, just tell someone. I was bullied for a year and a half and eventually wrote a letter to the head of my school. Be strong, and feel confident. Show the bullies that there is a good side to you. I changed through my experiences. While I was being bullied, I became shy and afraid, I even missed school. But then I realised that I wasn't the bad person in this, they were.

From Shazzy and Rae:

If you are being bullied tell a grown-up or a teacher or a friend that you can trust, tell someone that won't go and tell everyone. Don't be afraid to tell someone. Don't push back if they hit or push you, just walk away 'cause if you hit them back it will only make things worse. Remember be brave

From Gavin:

If you are getting bullied tell a teacher, parent or an adult and don't suffer. If you want to make them stop you just stand up to them and you will find they are nothing but cowards looking for attention or trying to be popular which they are really not

From Lucie:

The most important thing is to tell someone. It may not be that easy, I know, I have been there! But from my experience I have learned that you can't just sit around and wait for it to stop. You have to do something.

From Paul:

If you have an older brother or sister talk to them first, as they are more likely to be closer to your level on matters. Your parents are also more likely to listen and accept their word on the subject. If you have no older siblings try to make friends with some older people.

Helping someone else who's being bullied

Maybe you're not being bullied, but you know someone who is - perhaps that person is not even a good friend, but someone else in your school. Have you ever stood around and noticed that someone was being bullied, but you weren't sure what, if anything, you could do? Have you thought that maybe nothing you could do would make a difference?

Don't ignore bullying. You can help. Don't let the bullies get away with thinking that no-one will do anything. Here are a few things you can do, and a couple that you can't:

• Don't rush over and take them on - it might not be safe and you don't want other people to think you are a bully
• Let a teacher or other adult know what's happening
• Try to be a friend to the person being bullied
• Refuse to join in
• Try to be friendly to the bully, but even if you can't be friends, being kind can sometimes help the bully stop bullying
• Sometimes you can't sort it out yourself. Ask an adult for help

Are you a bully?

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